How to Know If Therapy is Working


If you’re new to therapy or just started seeing a new therapist, it’s common to question whether you’re making any progress. You may be expecting to notice big changes in your mood, or for the issues you’re dealing with to be quickly resolved. But, therapy is a process, and progress can take months – or in some cases even years. 

This being said, there are some signs that therapy is “working”. They can be as subtle as a sense of relief after your session or even quite life-changing . In this article, we’ll go through some of the signs to help you identify if therapy is working, and what may be the issue in the case that it’s not. 

Experiencing Fewer Emotional Ups and Downs

One clear sign that therapy is making a difference is when you notice fewer emotional ups and downs. This doesn’t mean life suddenly feels perfect, but you might find yourself feeling more grounded and better able to handle challenging moments without being completely overwhelmed. 

Emotional triggers that once felt impossible to manage may start losing their grip, and your mood might feel steadier overall. This sense of balance often reflects growth in emotional regulation – a key skill therapy helps you build. While the journey isn’t always linear, these shifts are powerful indicators that your hard work in therapy is paying off.

Walking Away with a Sense of Relief

Therapy isn’t always comfortable – it can bring up tough emotions or memories that you’ve been avoiding. But a positive sign that therapy is working is walking away from a session with a sense of relief, like a weight has been lifted. Even when the conversation feels heavy, this lighter feeling often comes from being heard, validated, and understood in a way that helps you process what’s been on your mind. 

It’s a signal that you're making progress and releasing some of the emotional burden you've been carrying. If you find yourself looking forward to your next session, excited to share updates, it’s a strong indication that therapy is creating a safe, productive space for your growth.

Handling Stress Like a Pro

Being able to handle stress in a productive way is a major sign that therapy is working. It doesn’t mean stress disappears – it’s a part of life. But therapy helps you learn tools to keep it from overwhelming you or holding you back. Maybe you’ve picked up techniques like deep breathing, journaling, or reframing anxious thoughts, and you’re starting to notice they actually help. 

Whether it’s meeting a tight deadline at work, managing the chaos of family holidays, or facing a life-changing challenge like moving to a new city, you find yourself approaching situations with more confidence and calm. Stress no longer dictates your mood or steals your joy, and you’re still able to focus on the things that matter most. When you feel better equipped to face the ups and downs of life without losing your balance, it’s a sure sign you’re growing through therapy.

Making Positive Changes in Your Routine

Making positive changes in your routine is a clear sign that therapy is working. These shifts might seem small at first – like setting aside time to meal prep, going for a daily walk, or establishing a consistent bedtime – but they can have a big impact on how you feel day-to-day. Therapy helps you identify habits that align with your goals and values while breaking free from patterns that don’t serve you. 

Whether it’s carving out time for hobbies you love, getting more organized at work, or prioritizing self-care, these changes reflect progress. They’re signs that you’re not only gaining clarity but also taking actionable steps to build a life that feels more balanced and fulfilling. Even on tough days, sticking to healthier routines shows that you’re committed to your growth.

Facing Challenges Head-On

Instead of avoiding difficult situations or conversations, you might find yourself feeling more equipped to tackle them directly. This could mean addressing a conflict with a friend, speaking up about your needs at work, or finally starting on a goal you’ve been putting off because it felt overwhelming. 

Therapy provides tools to manage the discomfort and fear that can come with facing challenges, helping you build confidence and resilience. Whether the hurdle is big, like making a career change, or small, like dealing with a packed to-do list, your willingness to confront it rather than shy away shows significant progress. It’s proof that you’re learning to trust yourself and your ability to handle whatever comes your way.

Communicating Better and Solving Conflicts

Communicating better and solving conflicts are key indicators that therapy is making an impact. You may notice that you’re expressing yourself more clearly, listening more effectively, and approaching disagreements with a greater sense of calm and understanding. Instead of avoiding conflict or letting it escalate, you may find yourself addressing issues in a way that feels productive and respectful. Whether it’s reconciling a misunderstanding with a partner, setting boundaries with a family member, or resolving a work-related dispute, these skills show real growth. Therapy helps you build tools to not only communicate your needs but also to handle differences with empathy and patience. These improvements can strengthen your relationships and make challenging social interactions feel less intimidating.

Feeling Closer to the People You Care About

Feeling closer to the people you care about is a heartwarming sign that therapy is working. When you’re struggling, it’s natural to want to pull away from others – whether it’s because you don’t have the energy, feel like a burden, or are overwhelmed by your own emotions. Isolation might feel like a way to protect yourself, but over time, it can leave you feeling even more disconnected. 

After some time in therapy, you may notice yourself leaning into relationships, sharing more openly, and allowing others to support you. That closeness can be incredibly comforting and remind you that you’re not alone and that meaningful connections are worth nurturing. Feeling safe and secure in your relationships can be considered a direct reflection of your healing and growth.

Setting Boundaries That Work for You

Setting boundaries that work for you is a big sign that therapy is making a difference. In the past, you may have found it hard to say no or felt guilty when you needed space. Maybe you’ve struggled with people-pleasing or letting others cross lines that felt uncomfortable. 

Therapy can help you recognize your limits and gives you the tools to protect your emotional well-being without feeling selfish. Whether it’s standing up for yourself at work, creating personal space in a relationship, or simply knowing when to say “enough,” these boundaries allow you to feel more in control and less drained. It’s all about finding a balance that feels right for you and gives you the freedom to show up as your best self, without overextending or compromising your peace.

Seeing Yourself and Your Patterns Clearly

Seeing yourself and your patterns clearly is one of the most empowering signs that therapy is working. Therapy helps you step back and take a deeper look at the thoughts, behaviors, and habits that may have been holding you back –  often without you even realizing it. You may start to notice recurring patterns in how you react to stress, relationships, or difficult situations, and begin to understand why those patterns exist.

This clarity allows you to make more intentional choices moving forward, rather than falling into old habits without thinking. It’s like gaining a clearer perspective on your own life – suddenly, you can see where things have been holding you back and make conscious decisions to change them.

Rewriting Negative Thought Cycles

We all have those moments when our minds spiral, when we’re focused on the worst-case scenarios or replaying past mistakes over and over. Therapy can help you recognize these patterns and, little by little, challenge them. Instead of automatically falling into a negative mindset, you may start to notice when it’s happening and can interrupt the cycle. By reframing your thoughts and learning to respond with more compassion and perspective, you can shift how you view yourself and your situation. 

This doesn’t mean the negative thoughts disappear, but you gain more control over them and stop letting them dictate your mood or actions. Rewriting those cycles is a huge step toward feeling more confident, hopeful, and empowered in your daily life.

Sleeping, Eating, and Energizing Better

Fueling your body with healthy habits can be a tell-tale sign that therapy is working for you. When you're struggling emotionally, it often takes a toll on your physical well-being – your sleep may suffer, your appetite may change, or you may feel drained all the time. Therapy can help you address the root causes of these issues, teaching you strategies to improve your sleep habits, nourish your body, and regain your energy. 

Maybe you're finally getting those restful nights, enjoying meals that fuel you, or noticing a boost in your overall energy levels. These shifts are more than just physical improvements – they reflect a deeper sense of well-being and a healthier connection between your mind and body. When you're feeling better physically, it's easier to face life's challenges and stay engaged with the things that matter most.

When Therapy isn’t Working: What’s the Issue?

If therapy doesn’t seem to be working, it might be helpful to consider a few possible reasons. Sometimes, the issue may be that the therapeutic approach isn’t the right fit for you. Different therapy styles or techniques work better for different people – what’s effective for one person might not be for another. For example, if you’re in talk therapy but feel like you’re not making progress, it could be that you need a more structured approach like cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) or something that focuses on a specific issue you’re facing.

Another possibility is that you may not be feeling fully comfortable with your therapist, which can affect the progress you make. A strong therapeutic relationship built on trust and openness is crucial, so if something about the dynamic doesn’t feel right, it could impact your ability to be open and work through difficult emotions.

It’s also worth considering whether you’re fully committed to the process. Therapy can be tough at times, especially when it brings up difficult emotions or forces you to face painful truths. It might feel uncomfortable or even discouraging, but pushing through these challenges is often where growth happens. If you’re holding back – whether consciously or unconsciously –  it may slow your progress.

Lastly, sometimes external factors in your life – like ongoing stress, health issues, or a lack of support – can make it hard for therapy to take full effect. Therapy works best when you’re in a place where you can engage and put in the effort, so if other aspects of your life are pulling your focus, it might be harder to see progress.

If therapy doesn’t seem to be working, it’s important to communicate with your therapist about how you’re feeling. Sometimes, a change in direction, a shift in goals, or even exploring a different type of therapy might be what you need to get back on track.

How LifeMD Can Help

Therapy can be an intense experience and seeing progress within yourself can make a significant difference in your mental health. Embrace the journey and know that with time you’ll find resolution in some of your concerns and handle stress in more productive ways. 

LifeMD makes it easy to access the mental health support you need, with services covered by insurance for 95% of patients. Take the first step toward support today with LifeMD.

Updated: January 16, 2025

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This article is intended for informational purposes only and should not be considered medical advice. Consult a healthcare professional or call a doctor in the case of a medical emergency.

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